“Aww, they grow up so fast.” That’s a phase that many have heard before while talking about kids of any age.
It’s also true.
At least, while it can’t be quantified, most parents will say that it feels their “baby” stage went by in the blink of an eye, and that they grow into teenagers a few blinks more than that.
This isn’t just a thing people say because they want their kids to stay young, either. It’s an actual feeling that many people have as they look at their growing children and realize their youth is over/ending.
But why does that happen?
How can a time period “go by” too fast?
Short Time Between Leaps
One reason that it feels like this time period goes quickly is because some parts of it actually do. “Newborn” is only one month, after which they start growing real baby features. Smiling and attention comes a few weeks later. Then there’s laughing, sitting, standing, making sounds like words, then finally crawling, walking, and talking.
For most children, all this growth happens in about 1 year.
That is a lot of growth and change to condense into such a short period of time. This time “goes by so fast” literally. Even after ~1 year old, they go from:
Sounds to full on conversations.
Barely walking to running full sprint.
Wearing diapers to, eventually, using toilets.
Going to school, making friends, learning math, and eventually becoming little adults.
Within a few more years they go from being amazed at the sounds a water bottle makes to going into the fridge and asking if they can have milk.
They start school at about 5 years old and can hit puberty and be almost as tall as their moms by 9 to 10.
They grow up very, very fast, and are changing rapidly during that time.
The Realities of Parenting
Another reason this time period “goes by so fast” is because of the realities of what parenting is really like.
Most of us are not just sitting around, playing with our children all day and creating a host of memories. We are:
Barely sleeping.
Navigating the new stresses of parenting.
Trying to manage a relationship.
On our phones.
Working.
Our children are also napping often, which means that they’re asleep through large chunks of the day. So, not only is it a short period of time, but we’re not present with them during that time, and often we’re also very tired and distracted.
Even the anxiety brought on by parenting can cause issues like memory loss and distraction, often making it feel like time goes by quicker.
The Growth is Gradual and Quick Simultaneously
A baby/child’s face changes dramatically from birth to being a teen. But it does so in small, gradual ways that we only notice by looking back at old pictures or trying to remember what their face looked like.
It’s sort of like boiling a frog. If they immediately jumped from baby face to teen face, you would be rightfully shocked and notice the change in a way that made their baby face more memorable. But instead, their face changes little by little day by day, in ways that are often imperceptible at first glance. That means that every time you’re looking at your child’s face, it looks roughly the same in your mind than it did before.
Yet, suddenly, you’ll think or look back on how your child used to look and realize how much they’ve changed. Because of that it will feel like it all happened in the blink of an eye, despite it really happening over time.
It is not just their appearance that changes either. Their knowledge, their confidence, and more. Children learn to read like this – they know a few letters, then a few sounded out words, and suddenly they’re reading words you did not know they can read. It can feel like it’s happening slowly because it’s happening over time, but suddenly you’ll realize how much has changed in such a short time and how you didn’t get a chance to truly think about and process it in the moment.
How Can Therapy Help?
Therapy may not be able to slow down time or prevent your child from growing up. But it can help with some of the things that make it difficult to truly remember and appreciate this time in a child’s life. For example:
Helping You Cope with the Stresses of Parenting – Some nervousness with kids is normal, but anxiety and stress do not have to be inevitable. We can work together to try to help you cope with the stresses of parenting so that you can focus on the best parts of it.
Couples Therapy – Couples counseling is not limited to couples that are struggling. Sometimes, it’s to help make sure that you’re working together as a team, something that comes up a lot when you have babies. Couples therapy can help reduce conflicts, which in turn makes it easier for you to focus on parenthood.
Mindfulness – Too much of life these days is spent on external things like phone, TV, work politics, etc. Sometimes, we need someone to help us learn to be more present in the moment so that we can really enjoy and take in all the things that our children are bringing to us, and we can be the best parents we can be.
Sleep Support – If you have issues like anxiety that you’re already struggling with, those make it even harder to sleep at a time when sleep is already hard to get. Mental health treatments in a general sense can help make sure you’re getting enough sleep so your memories are sharp and so time doesn’t feel like it’s moving as quickly. Sleep deprivation specifically affects how we experience the passage of time.
Therapists can help if you have postpartum depression. Therapists can help if you have conflicts with your child as they are getting older that is making it harder to bond. Therapists can help you manage your own aging, so that you can enjoy your own life more (which simultaneously helps life slow down for you).
Therapists can also help you with your own traumas and challenges, so that your child does not *have* to grow up too fast from a maturity standpoint, providing you more time with a kid that is able to be a kid.
A Therapist So You Get the Most From Your Child’s Development
Your child is still going to grow up, and it’s still going to be too fast. But how fast it feels and how many memories we make during that time period are affected by your mental health and your relationship.
As the term “AI” takes off, and more and more people choose to use these chatbots and related tools, it is becoming clear that unrestricted use of these tools is a problem.
We’re not just talking about ethics, plagiarism, or the economic impact. Chatbots, specifically, are proving time and time again to be problematic, especially for those struggling with severe mental health challenges. AI runs the risk of introducing problems or exacerbating existing conditions, and the interactions that someone has with it can cause significant harm.
About AI – What it Is
First, for clarity, “AI” does not yet exist. That is a marketing term. Current AI is actually an algorithm that uses a highly advanced predictive text to determine what the most likely word will be given their dataset. It is not capable of thought, reasoning, and certainly not emotions. Any sign of personality from within the program is coding designed to present information in a specific way.
This is important to understand because many people, even those without mental health conditions, feel like and think like they’re talking to computer “person” that is responding to their thoughts. The algorithm is designed to sound like a human being, but it is essentially just a 100x more advanced version of the predictive text on a person’s phone. It is not thinking and has no consciousness of any kind.
How AI Can Trigger Psychological Challenges
With that in mind, modern versions of AI Chatbots:
Sound like people, which makes it feel like you’re talking to a person.
Write with authority, so it makes it appear they “know” what they’re talking about.
Are marketed as if they’re artificial intelligence, rather than just a dataset algorithm.
Has no concept of right or wrong and cannot understand the user’s intent.
Can be intentionally/unintentionally programmed to respond in different ways.
Now, imagine a scenario where someone both doesn’t understand what AI is, and then also struggles with their mental health. It’s easy to see how this computer algorithm on the other end may cause issues that lead to further mental health challenges. For example:
Paranoia/Loss of Reality – Those that are struggling with issues related to paranoia or delusions may equate what chatbots say as either reality or hiding reality. Because these bots can be essentially told to answer questions in mysterious ways based on user prompts, it’s possible for individuals to misinterpret AI interactions as signs of a higher power, AI tracking, government interference, and more.
Depression – Most well known Chatbots are programmed to be careful around depression and suicide related topics, but this programming is tenuous. There are many examples of people sharing information with the chatbot with responses that are not sensitive to the person’s mental health. As these chatbots are unable to think, they are not always capable of determining whether the language output they provide could be interpreted as encouraging self-harm.
Personality Disorder Challenges – Chat algorithms do not always elicit consistent responses. As a result, someone that has abandonment issues (for example, a person with borderline personality disorder) may find that they expect their chat to react a certain way. If it does not, they can interpret that as rejection or abandonment.
It’s also possible for people’s usage of these AI Chatbots to be used to fuel their own mental health challenges further. For example, a person with health anxiety may search these chatbots for diagnoses and get incorrect answers. Or someone with body dysmorphia may seek out validation of their eating habits.
Guardrails to Manage Mental Health and AI
AI’s affect on society runs far deeper than chatbots. It can be used for Deepfakes. It can fuel eating disorders by creating impossible standards of beauty. It can be manipulative. There are also the economic and ethical reasons to be cautious around AI. Plus, the term itself “AI” is misleading enough to warrant concern.
But one other thing we are seeing that we need to monitor even more is the way that “AI” is affecting people that are going through mental health crises. As therapists, we may even have to be aware of clients using programs like ChatGPT in order to make sure that we can be proactive in monitoring for the effects on Chatbots on our patients, and encourage them to be more aware of the way they feel when using these services.
Many of Flourish Psychology’s patients live lives where discretion is critical and time is minimal. CEOs, content creators, doctors, attorneys, and more – these are individuals who are often tasked with work day and night, or find themselves with a busy personal and professional life where it is extraordinarily challenging to manage their mental health.
It is for these individuals that we created our exclusive mental health services. These are mental health services with significantly more availability, using a retainer model similar to the legal field that makes it possible to access mental health services on your schedule, personalized to you.
You can learn about our exclusive mental health services here.
On a surface level, it should already be easy to recognize why having your own individual therapist that is available more often when you need us most is valuable. You have access to a therapist when:
You’re in the middle of some type of crisis.
You have some rare but available free time.
You need someone to trust with your emotions or ideas.
Exclusive services allow you to have a therapist that is essentially on call, and while that doesn’t necessarily mean 100% availability, it does mean that you’re on a few coordinating steps away from someone at all times.
But this level of accessibility and higher level of care also has secondary benefits as well. It means that you have:
The knowledge that you are NEVER alone. With someone you can contact at any time whose role and expertise it is to help you, you will never feel like you’re taking on these challenges and emotional burdens by yourself.
Someone that knows you deeply – deeper than even traditional therapy. Exclusive services often mean that we can meet more often and connect much longer than traditional therapy typically allows.
A therapist unburdened by topic. Often, when you work with a therapist on a more limited basis, we have to keep the focus on the topic of need (for example, anxiety). With our concierge therapy services, this is no longer the case, as there is plenty of opportunity to talk about any emotions of challenges of note to you.
It is also simply a more catering level of care as well. We are professional therapists, and our role is your mental health, but concierge therapy allows for more services, more often, on more topics than traditional weekly or biweekly therapy allows, and that means that you have a therapist that is here to help you at every step.
If this type of therapy is right for your needs, please reach out to us today. We’d love to see if there is a fit or recommend options depending on what your needs may be.
Law is one of the most demanding fields, and the mental health effects of the profession are well documented. We touched upon this in one of our more recent resource pages that we added a few days ago. Lawyers, specifically as a result of their profession, are more prone to mental health challenges like anxiety and depression.
Still, we know there are many barriers to treatment. Culture around law is one, for example, as is the ability to find a therapist that specializes in what you need.
While we do occasionally see patients in person, we are primarily a remote therapy service, and believe fairly strongly that it is the best option for many of our patients. That is especially true for those in the legal profession. Remote therapy has many benefits, including:
Flexible Scheduling – Being a lawyer is intensely demanding, and any time you save at all is time that you can spend on your work. As remote therapy requires no commute and typically has more flexibility, it becomes a better option for those that are as busy as lawyers tend to be.
Discretion – Stigma amount mental health is thankfully improving, but in the legal field, there still exists this feeling like others cannot find out about your mental health. Remote therapy tends to be much more discreet, as you can see a therapist anywhere with internet access.
Access to Specialists – Flourish Psychology, for example, has extensive experience working with lawyers and those in high profile positions. While we are in NYC, where there are many lawyers, those in other areas of New York may not have as many specialists in the area. Remote therapy means they can contact us from anywhere, even if they’re as far as Buffalo.
We are also able to offer services such as concierge therapy, which is typically only possible remotely. For those that have higher level needs or want more personalized, on demand treatments, this door is opened due to remote therapy methods.
Do You Need in Person?
Many people feel like they “need” in person in order to benefit. But we’ve found that even those that are looking for in person therapy eventually switch to remote therapy, simply because it’s easier to manage and, in some cases, more comfortable.
If you’re interested in learning more about any of our mental health services, or about the benefits of remote therapy, please reach out to Flourish Psychology, today. We’re here to help attorneys of all backgrounds get the support they need and start seeing real change with their mental health.
There are many people in high profile positions that are struggling with their mental health right now. These are individuals, often in high demand, time consuming jobs, often require mental healthcare that is as discreet as it is available – psychological support that can be obtained when you need it, no matter when that may be, all with privacy in mind.
Here at Flourish Psychology in New York City, we are a private practice that often partners with individuals in high profile positions specifically to help them navigate their mental and emotional health in a way that caters to them, with services that are:
Available when and where you need them most.
Less limited by hours and insurance.
Entirely personalized to your life.
It’s a service known as “concierge therapy” that is personalized to your specific needs, available for those that have lives that require and benefit from someone that is always there for them.
Who Concierge Mental Healthcare is For
Concierge psychotherapy is for anyone that has demanding mental health needs that require both discretion and availability. It is often used by those of higher status that work in high profile roles and their spouses, providing individual psychotherapy and support available via phone, text, video, and more.
Flourish Psychology, as a boutique private practice, works with many of these high profile clientele. We recognize that individuals in this bracket often are looking for a therapist or psychologist that is more available to them for a variety of mental health challenges, as well as a partner and coach to help them through roadblocks, keep them motivated, help their energy, and so much more.
It’s for anyone that is looking for something different – a partner in mental health, unrestrained by traditional hour long sessions, there to provide support on a retainer basis as you need it.
Why Choose Flourish Psychology?
The therapists at Flourish Psychology are experienced in working with professionals and their spouses in these high profile, high achievement roles. Our therapists have worked with celebrities, influencers, lawyers, doctors, and executives at organizations across NYC. Based in Brooklyn, we are available remotely no matter where you’re located in the state, and can help with conditions such as anxiety, work stress, depression, eating disorders, relationship challenges, and much more.
If you’re looking for a different form of psychotherapy, one that’s designed for those of your background and achievement, please reach out to Flourish Psychology, today, or review our page dedicated to concierge therapy to see if it’s the right choice for your mental health needs.
One of the most common responses to the idea of seeing a therapist is that they can figure things out on their own. Many people, regardless of their education, income level, background, or the severity of their mental health struggles, often feel like all they need is to do a little research, complete a few exercises, and they can address their mental health by themselves.
Part of the reason that so many people feel this way is that we now have a wealth of access to information that can make people feel like experts. For example, you can read everything there is to know about something like cognitive behavioral therapy, including the methods and techniques used, and feel like you now know how to perform therapy.
But there’s something that many people should understand about mental health: no one does it alone. Not even therapists.
Therapists Know How Important it is to See Therapists
You might think that a therapist – a person specifically trained to provide mental health services – would not require or benefit from receiving a mental health treatment from someone else. But you would be wrong. In fact, therapists see therapists at an extremely high rate.
Although exact numbers will never truly be known, most people estimate that as many as 60% to 80% of all therapists are either currently seeing a therapist or have seen one for an extended period of time while they have operated a practice.
These are all individuals that deeply know and understand the mental health world, including how modalities like CBT and attachment and commitment therapy work, and yet they still see therapists themselves in order to address and improve their mental health.
Why?
The reason is because even though therapy is quite structured, and therapists like our team at Flourish Psychology are extensively trained, only a second person can:
Point out where our thinking is faulty or where we need to adjust our mindsets.
Keep us accountable in ways that we cannot do for ourselves.
Help us see different paths and new perspectives.
Listen when we have something we need to share to another person.
Therapists know that there is so much value to seeing a therapist that nearly all of us have, will, or do see a therapist at some point in our careers – and not only if we’re struggling with a mental health condition, but also simply because it’s helpful for our careers and our personal life to do so.
It’s Difficult to Take Things On Alone
It’s challenging to “go it alone.” No matter how much we feel like we can do it by ourselves when we’re struggling, the truth is that no matter how much you understand about mental health and how motivated you are to address it, seeing a therapist on your own is the best way to make sure that you’re getting the support you need.
If you are in need of any mental health support, contact Flourish Psychology today. It’s always better to speak to someone than it is to try to handle your mental health alone, and the benefits of seeing a therapist are substantial no matter how you’re feeling.
Location: 300 Cadman Plaza West Floor 12 - Brooklyn, NY 11201
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