Flourish Psychology is a private practice in Brooklyn that offers couples therapy services, available for couples in any stage in their relationship. Part of identifying the best way to heal and grow your relationship is to determine what approach is most likely to provide you with the greatest benefit.
We believe that every couple is unique, and – rather than adhere to one strict and rigid approach – we try to find out what solution makes the most sense for you both in your marriage or partnership.
The Gottman Method
One of the techniques that we may deploy is known as the Gottman Method. It is a popular, extensively researched couples therapy approach that integrates many different techniques to rebuild a relationship.
There are many tenants the Gottman Method, but the simplest way to understand this approach is that it identifies signs of a struggling relationship through specific behaviors (criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt) that are often identified within therapy, and then tries to address those through a series of techniques designed around rebuilding love, affection, trust, and communication – known as the “Sound Relationship House Theory.”
The Gottman Method is also a conflict resolution technique, and designed to help reduce issues with perpetual conflict.
What Are Some Gottman Method Therapy Techniques?
Like most forms of both therapy and couples counseling, the Gottman Method is not one single technique but a series of different strategies that the couple will do together. The Gottman Method is also actionable – meaning, there are specific tasks that the couples are expected to complete. Some forms of couples counseling are more about thoughts, feelings, and understandings, but the Gottman Method has specific tasks for each couple.
Examples of these techniques include:
Creating Love Maps – Love Maps involve creating connections and mental space in your mind for all the details of your partner, like who they are, their life history, their experiences, their traumas, their goals, and even specific things like their opinions and quirks. The goal is to know your partner intimately enough that they are almost like a part of you.
Learning to “Turn Towards” – Within relationships, partners often seek out love and affection from their partner. It’s not uncommon in struggling relationships for the other partner to ignore this need or not realize what is being asked of them. This technique helps the couple respond in a healthier way when their partner needs them.
Share Fondness and Admiration – One unhealthy habit that couples can fall into is forgetting to emphasize and share their positive views of their partner, especially if the relationship has created more toxic communication habits. This technique makes it easier to share positive traits within a setting where the counselor can guide healthy interactions.
The Gottman Method is extensive, and there are far more techniques that may be used, such as conflict resolution strategies, self-soothing, creating shared meaning, and more. What is ultimately used depends on where you are as a couple and what we see is the best way to help you achieve a long lasting relationship.
Gottman Therapists in NYC with Flourish Psychology
The Gottman Method is an outstanding approach to couples therapy, and we have helped many couples find greater strength in their relationship through this methodology. But it is also only one approach of many, and sometimes, it helps to know you as a couple to determine what therapy is best. Please schedule a time to speak about your relationship, and let’s help determine what will be the best way to provide you with a stronger, longer lasting partnership.
Flourish Psychology is a boutique private practice located in Brooklyn in New York City. We believe in individuality – of being and living your true self in a way that is free of judgment. We want you to be supported, and we want you to know that you deserve to be the true you.
But while we believe in seeing you the way you wish to be seen, we also acknowledge that it remains a challenging world for LGBTQ+ and those living alternative lifestyles. It can also be even harder the further away you are from large city centers, where coming out at all can be dangerous and finding the support you need even more difficult.
Benefits of Online Therapy in New York
The desire for discretion and privacy is one of the reasons that we offer remote therapy for those living throughout New York State. We know that even in big cities, where diversity is more common, it can be hard to feel free to be yourself. It is often even more difficult in the more remote areas of the state, where everyone knows their neighbor and where access to a psychologist that recognizes that individuality can be exceedingly difficult.
Our therapists, based in Brooklyn, provide LGBTQ+ affirming care to both support your ability to live your individuality, and to make sure you have the support you need to address some of the anxieties, stresses, and other issues you may struggle with as a result of both the pressures of society and day to day life.
By providing therapy online, you can receive treatment from the comfort of your own home. This allows you to:
See a therapist that is not directly connected to your community.
Receive treatment in a way that is completely discreet.
Be in a place where you feel safe and can be yourself during treatment.
Remote therapy also opens the door to see a therapist in areas that do not traditionally have access to any mental healthcare, let alone one that is experienced in supporting LGTBQA individuals. We can also provide gender affirming care for transgender adults, help you cope with the changes that may arise during transition, and provide coping strategies as you navigate a difficult medical system.
Free to Be Who You Are
In addition to our work with individuals, we also provide couples counseling and relationship therapy to any type of couple, including those in non-traditional relationships. We know you deserve support, and our therapists are here to provide it for you.
Let Flourish Psychology help you be you. Contact us today to learn more about our treatment options, or to be connected to one of our therapists.
Mental health is complicated. Relationships are also complicated. Sometimes, we are able to identify when we need help for one problem or the other. When we struggle with anxiety, we may seek out an anxiety therapist. When our relationships struggle, we may seek out a couples counselor. But, often, we do not always recognize the way that both can affect each other.
Individual or Couples Therapy?
Mental health can affect relationships and vice versa. For example, if someone within a relationship is struggling with issues related to anxiety and depression, it is likely to affect their relationship:
They may be more irritable, and more prone to conversational issues.
They may not lose some of their passion or willingness to try.
They may not be as social, or have trouble socially.
They may get overwhelmed easily or struggle to problem solve in a healthy way.
When one individual in the relationship is struggling with their mental health, the couples is often less intimate, less loving, and less likely to be able to handle conflict.
Similarly, our relationships have a direct effect on our stress levels and mental health. When a relationship is struggling, we may suffer from ongoing and persistent stress that can make us feel more anxious, more depressed, and more overwhelmed by other issues that happen throughout the day.
While we often try to identify as having one issue or the other, both mental health and relationships are not always so easily categorized. That is why it is so important for a therapist to get to know YOU. When someone really sees you and understands you, that’s how they can help you with your quality of life.
Identifying the Cause of a Mental Health Challenge to Treat it
Flourish Psychology, a private practice in NYC, offers both couples counseling and individual therapy to help patients and their partners get the help they need. We can schedule a consult for either one or both of you, talk to you about the struggles you’ve been having, and try to identify what approach to treatment and recovery makes the most sense for helping you improve every component of your life.
We also can treat your relationship issues as an individual. We can talk to you about your struggles within the relationship, see if there are ways we can guide you forward, and ensure that you’re receiving the individual care that you deserve.
Flourish Psychology is a boutique private practice that specializes in eating disorders and eating disorder treatment. Dr. Sadi Fox and her team of therapists work with adults that struggle with anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, and other disordered eating challenges, offering a safe and open space to help rebuild a healthier relationship with food and body image.
One challenge that many people face in silence is known as “night eating syndrome.” It is classified as an “OSFED” – an “Other Specified Feeding and Eating Disorder,” and many of the people that struggle with it do not realize that it is a type of disordered eating, or that it may be affecting their life.
Night Eating Syndrome: Symptoms and Challenges
Night eating syndrome is exactly as it sounds – a condition where a person tends to eat either late at night or in the middle of the night. The quantity of food is not important – some people eat large quantities of food (known as “binge eating”) but most just eat normal or even smaller quantities of food.
This type of challenge often goes unnoticed, because most people do not realize that it is a problem. After all, the quantity of food is normal, and the person feels hungry, so it feels like a logical action – “I woke up because I am hungry, so I am going to eat a little and go back to sleep.”
But the problem is that night eating is associated with many problematic issues, and often causes life impairment in ways that or often ignored:
Obesity – Night eating often adds unnecessary calories at a time in the digestion cycle where calories process more slowly. 10% of all individuals struggling with being medically overweight are found to be night eaters.
Disrupted Sleep – Those with night eating syndrome wake up multiple days of the week in the middle of the night to eat. Some others may wake up multiple times throughout the night. This causes disrupted sleep and a poor quality of life.
Nighttime Anxiety/Depression – Those with night eating syndrome tend to have or develop depression and anxiety at night. Eating may or may not relieve some of those symptoms.
These represent only a few of the physical, social, and emotional challenges that night eating can cause. Because night eating isn’t generally seen as a problem, these issues can persist for months or years before someone seeks help.
How is Night Eating Treated?
Night eating can be treated in several ways. From a therapist’s standpoint, the best approach is typically – although not always – cognitive behavioral therapy. Often there are psychological patterns and thought processes that need to be addressed in order to help people take control of not only their night eating habits, but also any struggles they may have with anxiety, depression, and self-esteem.
Other treatment options may include DBT and relaxation exercises. Your therapist at Flourish Psychology will talk to you about the different treatment choices and what makes the most sense based on your struggles.
Disordered Eating and Your Health and Happiness
Night eating syndrome is one example of the many ways that disordered eating can affect your life. Sometimes, the effects are more subtle or not well associated with mental health, but the damage it can do to a person’s health, happiness, and sleep quality can be substantial.
If you or a loved one struggles with eating disorders in NYC, please contact Flourish Psychology, today.
The human brain is fascinating. We like to think of ourselves as logical – believing that our thoughts and emotions are based only on our knowledge and experiences.
That is anything but true.
One amazing example of this is with what are known as “avoidance behaviors,” which play a big role in CBT and anxiety therapy. To understand the effects of avoidance behaviors, let’s use a common fear that many of us have: a fear of spiders.
An Irrational Fear
Most spiders are not dangerous. They rarely bite, they’re afraid of humans, and their toxins are not powerful enough to cause any real damage. The most common spiders in NYC, like the house spider, do not even have teeth that can break skin.
Even the black widow spider bites are never fatal to anyone over the age of 5 and under the age of 65, and rarely fatal to those age groups, and there are essentially no black widow spiders in all of Brooklyn or New York City for this to be an issue.
Yet, many of us still fear spiders. We can discuss the origins of this fear at another time (irrational fears are another reason the human brain is so fascinating) but in this case, let’s talk about what happens when we have this fear:
We see a spider and we run away.
We avoid places that have spiders.
We ask other people in the house without a fear of spiders to get rid of it for us.
These are examples of avoidance behaviors. They are very common for those that have anxiety. As anxiety therapists in NYC, many – if not most – of our patients will show some type of avoidance behavior when they come to us with an anxiety issue.
Now, you would think that avoiding spiders is a natural reaction to fear. You would also think that avoiding spiders is an emotionally-neutral reaction. Meaning, that avoiding something you fear isn’t going to make you fear it any more or any less. But study after study has shown that this is not the case.
In fact, what studies show is that when we avoid something, we *reinforce the fear*. Avoiding something tells the fear part of our brains that it is correct to fear the subject, and the result is that you are *more* likely to fear it in the future.
Why this occur is not entirely clear, but it is called “negative reinforcement.” Taking away or avoiding a bad thing reinforces an idea, thought, or emotion that we have. It’s why logic alone often isn’t enough to get rid of a fear. You might know that spiders are not dangerous, for example, but the more you avoid them, the more your brain thinks that they are.
Anxiety Therapy with CBT in NYC
Flourish Psychology, a Brooklyn-based private practice, works with many patients that are struggling with anxiety, depression, and other mental health conditions. Identifying avoidance behaviors is part of the process for treating anxiety, and one of the many core components of CBT. If you struggle with anxiety, contact Flourish Psychology, today.
Location: 300 Cadman Plaza West Floor 12 - Brooklyn, NY 11201
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