Panic attacks are intense. They are difficult. They can be so powerful and so immense both physically and mentally that many people start to fear them.
They are also very hard to stop without help, and one of the reasons they are so difficult to stop is because panic attacks – and the fear of having another panic attack – cause a cycle that makes it very difficult to stop future attacks without the support of an experienced therapist.
The Cycle of Panic Attacks
All anxiety has physical symptoms, but panic attacks are specifically physical events. Although they do trigger symptoms that affect thoughts and emotions, it is their physical symptoms that are most disruptive:
Rapid Heartbeat
Chest Pain
Trouble Breathing
Weakness
Sweating, and More
The cognitive symptoms also are connected to the physical ones. People experience “feelings of doom,” for example, that enhance the effects of these physical symptoms. There is a reason that many people seek out medical professionals when they have panic attacks, because it can be hard to believe something like anxiety can trigger that type of reaction.
Because panic attacks are so physical, we start to fear them. And like most things we fear, we become both:
Easily triggered when we think a panic attack is coming.
More likely to monitor our bodies for signs of an attack.
These have names: “hypersensitivity” and “self-monitoring.” We see them with most people that have frequent panic attacks. When we struggle with panic attacks and panic disorder, we tend to be more sensitive to sensations our bodies experience and more likely to notice them. Once we do, they can trigger more anxiety.
Finally, panic attacks are also stressful on the body. Over time, they can cause physical symptoms related to chronic stress, and chronic stress itself causes a variety of physical symptoms – including strange ones that may not normally be associated with stress.
So what typically happens when someone has panic attacks is the following:
Person experiences a very minor sensation of some kind, possibly caused by stress.
They notice the sensation immediately due to their self-monitoring.
They immediately react with fear as though a panic attack is coming.
Their hypersensitivity means their anxiety symptoms feel more pronounced.
Their fear that a panic attack is coming increases, causing more anxiety.
Their anxiety triggers a panic attack.
It’s also not a cycle that is easily in someone’s control. It is very hard to talk yourself out of it without help. Because the person is also living with frequent stress, they are likely to always have triggers – for example, the stress from recurring panic attacks can lead to breathing poorly, blurry vision, a jump in one’s heartbeat, and all of those trigger the fear that a panic attack is coming.
People with panic attacks may also develop health anxiety and other challenges as a result of these attacks, leading to even more anxiety-related triggers.
Stopping the Cycle
It is for these reasons that panic attacks often benefit from and require professional help. It is very, very difficult to stop this panic attack cycle without support, because your body is essentially primed to experience panic attacks. The work that is required to stop this cycle takes time – it requires retraining your mind, teaching yourself to relax, helping you cope with stresses, and more.
During that time, a person may still have panic attacks – although hopefully much less frequently. But with a therapist there with you, it’s also possible to address those without struggling with setbacks and gain those reminders that all the effort you are putting into reducing the attacks is worth your time.
Working with a therapist that specializes in anxiety is one of the best ways to make sure that you can stop that cycle. At Flourish Psychology, our therapists can make sure that you’re getting the support you need for panic attacks, anxiety, stress, and more, all with evidence based techniques. Get started today in NYC with Flourish Psychology, a boutique private practice.
Couples counseling – and couples therapy – is evidence based. We *know,* based on science, that these approaches work, and with the right guidance and support, you can improve communication, build trust, and see an improvement in your relationship.
But one thing that is important to understand is that a relationship is not only two people, but two unique, distinctive, entirely separate people. While couples counseling is designed to enhance the relationship, sometimes it is an individual’s needs that are just as important.
The Challenges an Individual Brings Into a Relationship
How couples communicate, how they build memories, how they tackle problems – these are all important for the relationship to succeed, and all parts of what make a relationship successful. They’re also issues that can be best worked on together, so that both partners are being pointed in the same direction and have a better understanding of each other’s needs and expectations.
Still, within a relationship, it is often the individual that needs to be addressed – either in addition to or even as an alternative to couples counseling. For example:
Anxiety and Depression – If one partner has anxiety and/or depression, it can be especially difficult to be present in the relationship. If they’re overstressed or worrying about many things, it can come out as irritability or damage a marriage.
Trauma – Past traumas play a tremendous role in our ability to manage a relationship. Unresolved trauma can make it hard for us to show affection, love, accept affection, feel connection, and more.
Individual Relationship Issues – Sometimes, within a relationship, a person needs to work through their issues privately or more personally rather than in front of their partner. It may be because the information feels too sensitive, or because they are individual issues and the partner is not necessarily someone to bring into the conversation yet.
Work stress, financial issues, even infidelity – there are many issues that a person may find would be better to address individually with a therapist, rather than with their partner in a couples counseling setting. Individual therapy can also help augment traditional couples counseling, giving each partner a chance to talk in private with a therapist about things they are not (yet) ready to talk about with their partners that came up during counseling.
Addressing the Individual and the Couple
Couples counseling remains one of the best tools we have for repairing a relationship. But that doesn’t mean that it is the only approach that will work. There are going to be those that may benefit from individual therapy, either in general or in the context of the relationship. Mental health is complex, and working together, we can determine the best way to make sure you’re living your best life and getting the most from the relationship. For more information about our couples counseling services in Brooklyn, please contact Flourish Psychology, today.
Society – and couples – are facing situations they have never faced before, and are being forced to adjust to those situations very quickly. One example of this is how to appropriately use technology while in a relationship. This is something that couples have essentially only faced in the past 20 years, especially with regards to smartphones.
We’re also now trying our best to figure out how to talk about these issues with each other and in therapy. An example of this is what we’re going to call “digital betrayal” – when you betray the trust of your partner by engaging in some behavior with technology that your partner feels you should not do.
Examples of Digital Betrayal
Digital betrayal is when you betray a partner through a phone, tablet, or other form of online technology, but did not necessarily betray them in person. It’s not infidelity in the typical sense, where someone engages in physical sexual behavior with another partner. Rather, it’s a form of trust betrayal that occurs solely online, and almost always without the other partner knowing. Examples may include:
Chatting or messaging an ex lover, celebrity, or member of the opposite sex in secret.
Watching pornography at inappropriate times or storing photos/video on their phone.
Sending or receiving sexual imagery from someone other than a spouse.
Not all “digital betrayal” is going to be sexual or romantic in nature, either. Betrayal can come in many forms, such as being on a person’s phone instead of getting an important task done, staying up playing games when you should be sleeping, or saying very overly negative things about a partner in a situation where sharing that information is not appropriate.
Another potentially common form of digital betrayal may also be looking at someone’s phone and private messages without consent. Our phones can have private conversations, and individual partners are allowed to have these conversations without the other partner reading them in secret.
No matter the type of “betrayal,” the commonality among all of them is that it breaks trust in the relationship and causes pain that both partners need to address.
Working Through Digital Betrayal in Couples Counseling
This issue between couples is new and complex. In some cases, there is a very clear betrayal of trust that both partners can acknowledge. In other cases, there may be layers – for example, someone may not understand why what they did was wrong, or may feel defensive about their technology usage. There are also issues with phone addiction and connection that may arise.
“Online infidelity,” and other similar betrayals of trust, are typically all factors that chip away at a relationship. In fact, even minor issues can become very serious problems in a relationship. If one partner does not trust another, they can sometimes rebuild that trust through spending time together and sharing conversations and experiences.
But digital trust is something that occurs almost entirely on a phone, and the thing is, most of us are going to still be on our phones. Being on the phone is also a solo activity, which means that a partner is going to be on their phone, semi-in secret, by themselves. This may lead to more distrust, among other relationship issues between partners.
It can be very difficult to break patterns on your own. Couples therapy offers a path to healing by addressing these issues directly and working to rebuild the trust that has been lost.
Couples therapy provides a safe space for partners to confront the betrayal, express their feelings, and begin the process of rebuilding trust. The therapy is structured to help both partners understand the underlying issues that may have contributed to the betrayal and to develop strategies for moving forward together.
Open Communication – A key element of the therapy process is fostering open and honest communication. This allows both partners to share their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment, creating a foundation for understanding and reconciliation. In this case, we would discuss fears, behaviors that have affected trust, and more.
Identifying Boundaries – Couples therapy also focuses on helping partners establish and agree upon clear boundaries in the digital realm. This might include setting rules for online interactions, discussing what is considered appropriate behavior, and agreeing on how to handle potential future challenges.
Rebuilding Trust – Trust is the cornerstone of any relationship, and rebuilding it after a digital betrayal can be a complex process. Therapists work with couples to gradually restore trust by encouraging transparency, consistency in actions, and emotional support. This process takes time, but with commitment and effort from both partners, it is possible to rebuild a stronger, more resilient relationship.
Recovering from digital betrayal is not easy, but couples therapy offers a structured approach to healing. By addressing the issues head-on and working together, couples can begin to rebuild the trust that has been lost. The therapy helps partners develop the tools they need to navigate the complexities of the digital world while maintaining a healthy, trusting relationship.
Get Started Today with Flourish Psychology
Flourish Psychology has an incredibly talented team of therapists that can provide couples counseling and related services to help you with these complex problems. We can also provide individual therapy, for those that are trying to gain a better understanding of themselves and take more control over their own behaviors.
At Flourish Psychology, we believe in helping both partners learn to better understand each other, and eventually themselves, and take a scientific approach to these types of relationship problems in order for both of you to move forward. For more information about our couples counseling services in NYC, please contact Flousih Psychology, today.
It is difficult to live through trauma, and the way we experience trauma – based on our age, personality, the type of trauma we experienced, and more – means that different people may benefit from different treatment approaches as we try to help them overcome it and move forward.
We offer many strategies for addressing trauma here at Flourish Psychology, including EMDR and CBT. We are also able to use an approach known as “trauma systems therapy,” which is not right for all patients but can be very useful when appropriate.
What is Trauma Systems Therapy?
Trauma Systems Therapy (TST) is a comprehensive psychotherapy approach designed to support children and adolescents who have experienced trauma. This method recognizes that traumatic experiences can have a significant impact not just on an individual’s emotional state but also on their behavior and relationships.
TST takes into account both the personal experiences of the individual and the environment in which they live, including their family, school, and broader community, all with the goal of helping these younger people better address and overcome trauma-related issues.
The Core Components of Trauma Systems Therapy
TST is built around several key components, each of which plays a role in helping individuals recover from trauma. These components are designed to work together to address both the internal and external factors that can influence a person’s ability to cope with and heal from trauma. It believes in:
Creating a Sense of Safety – The first step in TST is ensuring that the individual feels safe. This involves both physical safety and emotional security, helping the person to feel protected and supported in their environment.
Emotion Regulation – TST teaches individuals how to manage and regulate their emotions. This is particularly important for those who have experienced trauma, as they may struggle with intense emotions that can be difficult to control.
Supportive Environment – A critical aspect of TST is working with the individual’s environment, including their family and community, to create a supportive and nurturing space. This might involve educating family members, training school staff, or connecting with community resources to ensure that the individual has a strong support system.
It can differ from other forms of therapy in that it is very community based, looking at overcoming trauma as something that is fostered around the person in addition to supporting them through therapy.
Why Trauma Systems Therapy Matters
Trauma can have long-lasting effects on a person’s life, particularly if it occurs during childhood or adolescence. TST is important because it recognizes that recovery is not just about addressing the trauma itself but also about ensuring that the individual’s environment supports their healing. By taking this comprehensive approach, TST helps individuals build resilience, develop healthy coping mechanisms, and ultimately move forward in their lives with a stronger sense of well-being.
Therapist for Trauma in NYC with Flourish Psychology
Trauma Systems Therapy is not right for all patients. Part of the process of therapy is discovering what approaches might work best for you or your loved ones, no matter what those needs may be.
Still, in situations when it is appropriate, Trauma Systems Therapy is a powerful tool for helping individuals recover from trauma by focusing on both the person and the systems around them. It provides a structured, supportive approach that addresses the complex nature of trauma and its effects, offering a pathway to healing and growth.
For more information about our trauma therapy services, or to schedule an appointment for yourself or someone close to you, please contact Flourish Psychology, today.
There are many psychological struggles that can come up in a person’s life. Some people struggle with depression. Others struggle with ADHD. Others struggle with issues related to trauma. These issues can be so overwhelming that they become unmanageable.
Anxiety can be a little different. Severe anxiety and panic attacks can certainly be unmanageable as well. Many people struggle with anxiety that can be debilitating and dramatically impact a person’s life. But there are others that have a more generalized anxiety that is upsetting, disruptive, and uncomfortable, but on a day to day basis they can manage it.
But should you?
Benefits of Treating Anxiety
Many people live with anxiety without seeing a therapist because they can “manage it.” Despite feeling symptomatic of anxiety on the day to day, they are still able to do their jobs, spend time with their family, laugh, engage in a social life of some kind, and otherwise live what they view as a “normal” life.
Still, what you’re struggling with is not “normal.” You are living with and managing anxiety. It is affecting how you feel, your health, your ability to cope with things, and much more.
You deserve to live your *best* possible life – not just one that feels normal to you. Anxiety of all kinds can affect that. Treating that anxiety can help you:
Feel Healthier – Anxiety causes issues like upset stomach, headaches, even random aches like eye pain. If you have anxiety, chances are you do not feel your best, and that’s something that you can improve by learning to control and reduce anxiety through therapy.
Stress Management – Sometimes, we do not realize how our emotions are affected by our mental health. If you have anxiety, your mind and body are under constant stress. If you’re ever feel easily upset, overwhelmed, irritable, angry, or other negative emotions, it may be because you are already under constant stress from anxiety.
Memory and Happiness – Anxiety, quite literally, has an effect on our memory. We are less likely to remember the enjoyable activities we completed and less likely to form memories. When treat anxiety, we can feel happier, experience happiness for longer, and remember more happy memories in the future.
Better Sleep – When we have less anxiety, we tend to fall asleep more easily and stay asleep longer. This is important not only for our physical health, but our mental health as well, as it reduces anxiety symptoms and makes it easier to cope with stress.
Prevention of Worsening Anxiety – It’s a good thing that your anxiety is manageable now. But psychological health is not static. It can change depending on experiences, health, and things like sleep. Learning to cope with your “manageable” anxiety can make it less likely your anxiety will get worse in the future.
Above all, even if you *can* live with your anxiety, you should not have to. Anxiety does not have to be something you live with. There are many mental health strategies that we can implement together to help improve the quality of your life and your overall psychological health.
Start Today – Learn More About Managing Anxiety
Anxiety is not destiny. There are many effective mental health tools that we have available to address and reduce anxiety. If you feel like you’re struggling with anxiety symptoms and want to learn more about how we can provide you with effective treatments, please reach out to Flourish Psychology, today.
Location: 300 Cadman Plaza West Floor 12 - Brooklyn, NY 11201
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